DI voice | The cost of reading

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I lost my library book and owe them $ 250. I have also been on this campus for three weeks.

Saying these two sentences together out loud suggests that I am less equipped for college. eexperience than I once thought. But maybe this is the price I have to pay for “LARPing” as a intellectual because be completely transparent I find reading a drag.

But my desire to be admired as a girl who reads is almost as strong as my disdain for the boring task at hand.

There are several things my dorm is too small for: having pets, owning a stove and more above all, lose a pound. How I can’t find something in a room that’s about 10 square feet Amazes me; yet here I am on all fours, looking under my bed for a book that I was never going to read read.

I never thought that this, of all things, would be my downfall.

And if my roommate is reading this, I sincerely apologize for all the dirty looks I gave you when I suspected that my precious possession had been stolen. I realize that you probably have better things to do with your time than terrorizing local book readers. I just couldn’t accept the fact that I am so irresponsible.

After several unsuccessful searches, it came to my attention that my book sprouted legs and ran away.

But frankly, I wish him all the best. I like to imagine my book in the country, installed in a sensible house with a beautiful woman and a few little books of his running: a fairytale ending.

Nevertheless, I find it inhuman that books are locked up day and night in libraries, and I personally feel that I am doing the literary world a human favor.

So here’s my suggestion for anyone considering reading for fun this fall: don’t. Go pick apples instead. I have never heard of a fine of $ 250 for losing an apple. I’ve also never heard of anyone baking a delicious pie based on the books.

But if you need to check something out of the library, don’t forget to keep track of it. Save yourself the headache and financial blow.

Finally, if you see a copy of “Metropolitan THEif”By Fran Lebowitz lying around, thank you for contacting me.

Caroline is a freshman in media.

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